Tuesday, October 23, 2007
The Politics of Youth Sports...and the Collateral Damage
I'm tired. I'm tired of feeling frustrated. I'm tired of feeling bitter. I'm tired of feeling negative. I'm tired of the drama that seems to be part and parcel of kids' sports.
When your 12-year old son leaves a two-hour football practice upset about something, and you find out it's because he overheard the coach telling another player's father that he prefers his son at quarterback--the main position your son has played all season--it makes you want to lash out and hurt that person the way he's hurt your child. I don't want to feel that way!
I know life isn't fair. I know that in my brain, but I still haven't accepted it in my heart.
The main problem, as I see it, is that the kids pay for the coach's indecision. Maybe that's the way it is in college and professional football too come to think of it.
This coach played my son in five different positions last year, and my son never complained. How can anybody improve when they aren't allowed the time to do so?
This year, my son worked out all summer as quarterback. He played the pre-season games and the first four games of the season as quarterback. He did a good job. He made some mistakes. He had some success. He has a calm quiet about him--a good characteristic for the leader of a football team. Then, after throwing one interception, the coach pulls him and tells him he'll be playing defense. Again, my son--although disappointed--didn't complain, and accepted his fate. However, one practice later, the coach tells my son that he'll switch off with last season's quarterback--who had been playing wide receiver this year--as quarterback. Sure enough, at the game the following week, he switches the two boys back and forth in the position. They each have their strengths. But, again, how can anyone find their place, if their place is continually moved?
Without any explanation, after the one game of "job sharing" the next game sees my son back to being the main quarterback. That lasts for four games. Now, with only two games left in the season the coach appears to be ready to switch the quarterback position again.
I think the part that bothers me the most is that for this coach, he's just playing a board game. For the kids, this is much more emotional. It's personal. They've worked hard--and I mean HARD--for four months. To not know where they'll be playing each time they show up seems to be an unnecessary complication. They're constantly waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under them. And I thought youth sports were for fun and exercise, not to introduce the kids to the politics of adulthood. Isn't there enough time for that later?
When your 12-year old son leaves a two-hour football practice upset about something, and you find out it's because he overheard the coach telling another player's father that he prefers his son at quarterback--the main position your son has played all season--it makes you want to lash out and hurt that person the way he's hurt your child. I don't want to feel that way!
I know life isn't fair. I know that in my brain, but I still haven't accepted it in my heart.
The main problem, as I see it, is that the kids pay for the coach's indecision. Maybe that's the way it is in college and professional football too come to think of it.
This coach played my son in five different positions last year, and my son never complained. How can anybody improve when they aren't allowed the time to do so?
This year, my son worked out all summer as quarterback. He played the pre-season games and the first four games of the season as quarterback. He did a good job. He made some mistakes. He had some success. He has a calm quiet about him--a good characteristic for the leader of a football team. Then, after throwing one interception, the coach pulls him and tells him he'll be playing defense. Again, my son--although disappointed--didn't complain, and accepted his fate. However, one practice later, the coach tells my son that he'll switch off with last season's quarterback--who had been playing wide receiver this year--as quarterback. Sure enough, at the game the following week, he switches the two boys back and forth in the position. They each have their strengths. But, again, how can anyone find their place, if their place is continually moved?
Without any explanation, after the one game of "job sharing" the next game sees my son back to being the main quarterback. That lasts for four games. Now, with only two games left in the season the coach appears to be ready to switch the quarterback position again.
I think the part that bothers me the most is that for this coach, he's just playing a board game. For the kids, this is much more emotional. It's personal. They've worked hard--and I mean HARD--for four months. To not know where they'll be playing each time they show up seems to be an unnecessary complication. They're constantly waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under them. And I thought youth sports were for fun and exercise, not to introduce the kids to the politics of adulthood. Isn't there enough time for that later?
